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In Soviet Russia, Coat Wears You - Tuesday, Nov. 13, 2007
At Least It Says 'Queen'... - Thursday, Oct. 04, 2007
See The Conkering Hero Comes - Monday, Sept. 17, 2007
A Friend in Need - Monday, Aug. 27, 2007

Tuesday, Nov. 13, 2007 - 4:34 pm

Okay, I�ll allow it, outside of daylight hours it�s pretty nippy. But�seriously? The big coat is still hanging on the back of my bedroom door, I�m not even sure where my scarf is and I still sat for half this afternoon with the back door open. We did Soup �n� Sparklers for Guy Fawkes and I had to go in from the garden half way through the evening to put on a short-sleeved shirt. When the sun goes down it gets cooler, and the wind doesn�t help, and it has rained a little, but that doesn�t mean I don�t get to whinge about the whingeing. Specifically, the whingeing in my direction. I�ve said it before but what the hey, this is my place and I�m going to say it again:

1) I am not cold, and
2) If I were cold, I am in fact a fully functioning adult person capable of going and getting a coat and putting it on. By the fact that I have chosen not to exercise this right, you may assume that I am not feeling the cold.

Mostly it�s old ladies, and having had a grandmother who felt the cold terribly and couldn�t understand my�.metabolism (?) I�m happy to indulge with a pleasant smile and a word or two. But everyone else? Please stop asking. Please, please stop asking. I�m not cold.

Well all right, all right, occasionally I am cold. But I prefer being cold. Given a choice between being too hot or too cold I�ll take cold any day. There are things one can do when cold in order to warm up, whereas there comes a point in being too hot that public decency laws step in and you can�t do anything about it. I cannot abide being too hot. I can barely stand being more than �pleasantly warm�. Basically once I start to sweat, even slightly, I hate it. I swear it makes me panic a little. This body doesn�t like it. That is not the metabolism I�ve been handed.

It helps that even if I have gotten cold, I warm up fast as soon as I�m back anywhere room temperature�d. And equally I cool down slow, so if I�ve left a warm-ish place I stay warm for ages. So long as I�m moving, you may assume that I am warm enough.

Well, it�s either the metabolism or the sub-epidermal fat, anyway.

My long-rambling point is:- please stop asking. I�m running out of witty replies. My standard to �Aren�t you cold?� (cf. grandmothers) is a smile and �Hardly ever.�, but I either need some new lines or I need to take out an ad in all the local papers so people stop asking. Please assume that the person you see walking around in a short-sleeved sweater, who looks otherwise perfectly happy and content, has not in fact just been mugged for her coat. Assume that she has the sense to put on a few extra layers if she wants them. Assume that all her jumper sleeves have not tragically shrunk in the wash and she�s too broke to buy any more. Really, just assume she�s perfectly happy in herself and leave her alone.

Unless she�s actually turning blue, in which case boil a kettle. But that hardly ever happens�

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